Unsung Characters in the Ecosystem
Audience energy, intimate encounters, and the ones who we thought were behind.
This big, beautiful ecosystem of human culture is made up of many meaningful contributions and characteristics.
There are lots of traits and abilities that we celebrate as a society.
We love people who are smart, hard workers, funny, popular, successful and generous.
We have these metrics by which we measure success, worth and valuable contribution. We think these kinds of characteristics are what’s keeping this whole thing running. But it’s just the shiny parts. The obvious.
There’s so much more to be celebrated.
So much more going on to form a functional and balanced ecosystem.
So much more that makes this place enjoyable.
So who else is contributing to a meaningful and warm society?
A healthy and connected society.
A society of both bold offering and generous reception…
What and who, is on the other side of some of these attributes?
Do you know the people who have all the right facial expressions when you’re telling a story? The ones who gasp at all the right bits. Who tilt their head to the side in compassion at just the right moment. Who ask thoughtful clarifying questions.
These are my favourite people.
The ones who sense an energy and magnify it.
These people so present to a conversation.
So invested in the story.
The people reflecting the value of your experience back to you with their faces.
Where would we be without these people?
Any performer will tell you that an engaged and responsive audience can elevate the atmosphere of a performance exponentially.
These people with their facial expressions and their conversational eyebrows and their receptivity are the everyday audiences. Audiences to any size performance. Any small story. Any micro communication. Generously elevating and expanding the atmosphere of the spaces they find themselves in.
NOTHING can light me up more in life than somebody who laughs at my jokes. It’s the first thing I tell Jarrod about after meeting a new friend. How they received my sense of humour. Whether they ‘got’ me.
Nothing speaks warm affirmation straight into my heart like someone’s laughter. Or even better, when somebody is on your wave length when you’re doing a bit and RIFFS WITH YOU!!!
The. Joy.
I imagine it’s what being good at surfing feels like.
Teenagers are masters at this. Veterans of collaborative funniness.
It’s the ultimate feeling of being understood, to me. People who can sense somebody else’s humour and meet them in it are pure goodness. Have you ever seen the twinkle in someone’s eye when their joke is received well? Such a gift.
I did well in school. I was often applauded for being a ‘hard worker’ but really, I just had the privilege of having the exact set of skills that can see you coasting by in an academic setting for an extended period of time.
Our final grade in year 12 was a rank.
Which means my success was built on the backs of the ones who didn’t fit there.
The ones who tried far harder than I ever did.
My achievements in schooling were only evident in comparison to their struggle. Were only possible in comparison to their struggle.
I’m just lucky that this society values reading, writing and memorisation.
I am still in awe of those kids. By their commitment to their own improvement, even when feeling chronically ‘behind’ in a system that perpetuated this kind of unhelpful, unfair and unnecessary hierarchy.
The way they cared not to be the best, but just to keep doing their best.
I was never concerned with my personal academic growth in that way. I was addicted to the high of comparative achievement.
They weren’t running a race. Just a humble walk towards personal improvement.
As children and teenagers, they were exhibiting the values I am only just learning to appreciate now. In this way, the people who struggled in school, paved the way for the rest of us to know what learning and success are, separate from - and without the distraction of - competing or winning. They were far ahead of me in this regard.
Honing wisdom when all I cared about was knowledge.
We are all in awe of great communicators. Talented public speakers who can pass on information with charisma, connection and captivating stories.
But what of the brilliant listeners?
The ones who wait patiently for stories to reach their climax before responding generously with enthusiastic dialogue.
The ones who hear beneath your words and respond to the wounded child within.
The ones who look deep into your soul when you’re trying to pretend that everything is fine. Who catch you before you knew you were falling.
These people have saved me on countless occasions. The ones you know will always hold a safe space for you. Who are incapable of anything else.
I owe much of my growth and all of my gratitude to these people.
There are homes all over the world right now where a loving parent is singing a child to sleep. Calming their nervous systems and nourishing the relationship. A delight filled encounter for child and parent alike. Secret voices reserved for this special bedtime ritual - so often never heard by any other souls.
Singers who hit the big time unquestionably infuse depth, vulnerability and solidarity into the cultural landscape. But we’d be missing something precious without these micro encounters of intimate musical exchange.
Profound is the musician singing in a bar to an audience of twelve. What a gift to those twelve, to hear melodies nobody else has heard. To be present to such an exclusive influence. To witness a moment that could touch their lives in ways not many others have experienced. A pocket of musical connection that could never be explained in words.
How powerful is the dedication of the lesser known artist.
To be content with intimate gigs and minimal revenue.
To be so in love with the music that sharing it with just one other person is enough to keep them playing. Singing not to a sea of phone lights but directly into someone’s eyes. Savouring the connection over the mass applause.
Showing us all what the heart of music is about.
All this to say that there are subtle, intimate, micro encounters the world over that are forming the kind of atmosphere that keeps this whole culture flourishing.
Humour, intelligence, success and kindness are all admirable, but would be nothing without a place to land.
These are just some of the unsung character traits of the ecosystem.
The ones that crystallize our unity, and amplify the beauty of every meaningful encounter.
The ones that we thought were flaws, but are in fact fertile ground for profound wisdom.
x
Lysette